I SWEAR TO GOD THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS ON TUMBLR
one time i was on a date at a really expensive restaurant and we had just finished our dessert and i was still starving but i couldnt just order anymore because i didnt want to look greedy so i told my date i needed to make an important phone call, excused myself from the table, then walked out the restaurant and ran to the mcdonalds two stores down and got myself a big mac before returning to the restaurant and apologising for taking so long
once in kindergarten a girl asked me to write “super girl” on her arm since i was the only kid who could write so i wrote “shit” on her arm and i hid under the table for like 30 minutes then the teacher found me and yelled at me then called my parents and my dad laughed so hard he cried
Let’s make out and play video games in our underwear.
is “I’m sperming” an appropriate thing to say during love making
BEING UGLY IS REALLY FUCKING ANNOYING